If I'd known ...

I was wondering recently what I would have done differently if someone had told us a terrible pandemic was coming which would affect the whole planet and completely transform our lives.

If I’d known we would be unable to travel and see family and friends, what might I have done? If I’d known that I couldn’t hug my children and grandchildren, how could I have prepared? If I’d know that going shopping would be very different, having to queue and wear masks. If I’d realised that even going to IKEA would turn into an awkward and unwelcome shopping experience. 

Queuing outside shops.

If I’d known that going to anywhere like a National Trust property would mean booking in advance, reduced numbers, social distancing, and then having to sit outside with a takeaway coffee and cake in the autumn chill, would I have stayed at home? If I’d known that social distancing meant treating everyone cautiously as a possible virus carrier and that our social life would be severely dented, what might I have done?

I feel as if we sleep walked into the pandemic, not having a clue what was facing us. At first it was quite enjoyable with the slow down in life but we didn’t have to home school children, while trying to work at home ourselves, in a small flat in the middle of a city. I didn’t lose my job nor was I furloughed. The pandemic is a great leveller. Everyone from the Queen to the humblest citizen had to stay at home unless they had an essential job, but it is the consequences now that have perhaps been the most shocking.  Our whole lives have not returned to what was normal and it does not look as if we will ever do so. 

What might I have done if I’d known?  I’m not sure there is anything I could really have done except perhaps been prepared mentally.  However that could have been counterproductive, as we may have imagined things far worse or quite differently. Someone recently asked why did God not warn us?  

I don’t know but the one thing God has promised and in my opinion has proved very faithful is that he will never leave us or forsake us.  My relationship with God, which was not that bad before, has deepened. I have never prayed as much or as strategically as I have in recent months. I have learned how to pray for nations and governments. I have learned to pray and trust God with the big things of life.  I have learned to be thankful for everything and maybe that is what I might have done if I’d known …I might have appreciated all that I had with a far greater depth of thankfulness. I may have valued everything and not taken so much for granted. 

I have also learned that ‘All things work together for good for those who are called according to his purpose.’   There is much good that has come out of this – the Church has emerged from its closed buildings onto the internet and has encountered so many more people. 

The Church, along with many others, has reached out to the poor and needy in our society. I remember the singing vicar who walked his streets singing Christian songs to encourage his parishioners. The Blessing has become an anthem of 2020. There have been many inspiring stories as people have reached out selflessly to those in need.

Abroad, those living in the greatest poverty before are living even more fragile lives once coronavirus hit their countries. It has been so good to stand with them in prayer and finance. 

There is now one absolutely certain fact. Everything has changed and almost certainly, nothing will go back to how it used to be.  Life may not be what I want, but I’m going to appreciate what I have now and take nothing for granted. It’s no point complaining; we still have much to be thankful for. 

God is working out a much bigger plan and purpose that should keep us focused, prayerful and expectant. We all have a part to play. The world needs Christians who can bring hope and life to those struggling with unemployment, debt, sickness and despair. There is a harvest out there and the Lord of the Harvest needs his harvesters ready with scythes and fishing nets. 

I never realised 2020 was going to be like this and none of us knows what 2021 might be like but even if the virus is still challenging our lives, still bringing unexpected and unwanted change, still confining us and making our relationships challenging, God is faithful and trustworthy. God is in control. 

Please leave a comment about what you might have done 'If I'd known ..."

Unexpected complications

A recent extensive road trip around South Africa was plagued by things going wrong or not turning out as expected. Time after time, events were just not as planned or anticipated. This led to disappointment and a sense of uncertainty. It has also highlighted some interesting if rather uncomfortable ungodly beliefs.

We did a similar trip 4 years ago and everything went really well. It was a wonderful time with few hiccups. I expected the same this time but even when booking accommodation, nothing worked out as hoped. What we wanted was not available and we had to compromise and juggle all the arrangements. Finally we had a workable itinerary.

However as we travelled we faced all sorts of unexpected challenges often to do with food or weather or an unwelcome number of bugs trying to share our safari tent. Nothing was too bad but after three punctures, two of them out in the bush requiring a wheel change with dangerous animals around I really began to question what was going on.

My first thought was that maybe I had done something wrong or had I sinned? Maybe we shouldn’t have done this trip at all and God was showing his displeasure by not blessing our travels.  It was at this point that I pulled myself up short and realised my mind was on a journey of its own with a dangerous destination.

Does God really only bless us if we do as he wishes? Does God only bless good choices? Of course not! God is good and kind and blesses us all the time whether we deserve it or not. It is a lie to believe that when things are going well God is pleased with you and blesses you but when things are not going well God is displeased with you withholding his blessing. The truth is that you are pleasing to God all the time and God is blessing you in every way that is good for you and will bring forth fruit from your life.

There is no doubt that God uses the bad times, the difficulties, the unexpected, the pain to mould our character and help us trust him. If everything goes swimmingly all the time, we hardly need God but when difficulty upon difficulty piles up we have to lean into God and trust him. When we trust God is doing good even in the midst of problems, troubles, hitches and complications especially unexpected ones, faith and trust in God grows.

Every time something unexpected happens leading to disappointment, even over things as trivial as the weather we need God to set us on our feet again, assure us that nothing has gone wrong because of something we have done or not done. We haven’t sinned – this is just life.  By the way, the disciples had the same problem believing that difficulties came from someone’s sin (Luke 13: 1 -2 and John 9: 1 – 3).

I was reading that it is in the pressure of the cocoon that the caterpillar turns into a butterfly. It is a process that cannot and must not be bypassed or hurried. It is an essential process.

All our unexpected difficulties and experiences led me to realise some ungodly beliefs that I had hidden in my heart that would never have come out or been confronted if everything was going well.  I’ve had to let God soothe my disappointments and show me that things were not that bad. He was always with us in the good and bad days. I can trust him.

After all ‘all things work together for good for those who are called according to his purpose’ Romans 8:

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Dealing with cynicism

Live as children of the light (for the fruit of the light consists of all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord.  Ephesians 5: 8 – 10

From Ephesians 4: 17, through chapter 5 to chapter 6: 9, Paul urges the Ephesians into Godly living. His teaching is very specific, comprehensive and practical and is a wonderful if rather challenging exhortation of how to live. Only some of Jesus’ teaching is even more challenging.

Ephesus was a major centre of commerce with flourishing temple worship to the Roman goddess Diana so the Christians in Ephesus had a lot to contend with. This must be why Paul gave them so much advice on how to live right in the midst of idolatry and a Godless society.  The problems we face in our societies today may not have much to do with worshipping Diana but the challenges are just as real and difficult for the modern day Christian. We too must live as children of the light in our Godless societies and it can be very hard.

In UK one of the major obstacles to Godly living, very prevalent in society is cynicism. Cynicism is ‘an inclination to question whether something will happen or whether it is worthwhile.’ Cynicism’s first cousin is scepticism which doubts the truth of something. Cynics tend to look down on the kind of advice Paul gave the Ephesians with a certain amount of derision. People feel it is not worthwhile to live the sort of life Paul was talking about in today’s culture; there is nothing in it for them. Cynics doubt people’s motives so if Christians are kind, loving, generous, merciful and so on cynics are sceptical about why they are doing it. 

Cynicism though is also prevalent in the church and people extravagant in worship or giving or who are enthusiastic about God and his love are viewed very cautiously and as ‘over the top.’ The same love, kindness, grace and mercy are viewed suspiciously as ‘too good to be true’ but that is exactly what God is – too good, kind, generous, loving, and merciful to be true except it is true!

Cynicism and scepticism like unbelief need to be rooted out of our lives. Cynics find it very hard to trust God and to believe that he wants good things for his children because for a cynic there is always an ulterior motive – God must want something so what is this going to cost me and so doubt clouds their minds. However we know the full price for salvation, forgiveness and a life of love was paid by Jesus on the cross and all we need is to walk by faith – hard if you are a sceptic.

The solution is to put out arms of love and trust to God, declaring and believing that what he has said is true and so silence cynicism and scepticism with words of life and faith.

Trusting God with our hearts

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding Proverbs 3: 5

When we become Christians we talk about giving our lives or our heart to the Lord but these two expressions are not the same. Giving our lives to Jesus talks about living for him instead of ourselves; we prioritise him in our lives so he becomes the most important person in our daily existence. Giving our hearts to Jesus is about how we feel and think about him and others. It is about letting Jesus touch and heal our emotions so we reflect his love and kindness to others.  

When I gave my heart to God, it was strongly encased in a hard shellto protect it because I had decided that due to past wounds, no one would hurt me or get too close to me again. By nature I am soft hearted but I felt people didn’t care about me that much; they had hurt me and so I let this hard shell surround my heart. I had to ask Jesus to take away the hardness.  In addition my heart had some very sore scabs from the wounds I had suffered from misunderstandings and thoughtlessness on the part of others. I had to ask Jesus to heal my heart and with his love and grace he has soaked away the hard shell and the sore scabs so my heart is much softer now towards both him and others.

I also had to learn to trust him to look after my heart and protect it from the inevitable hurts, pains and disappointments of this life. This was a really hard thing to do because by entrusting my heart to Jesus it felt like it was sitting exposed on the palm of his hand. It made me feel very vulnerable. However Jesus has proved faithful and he has protected me so when the knocks and hurts of life come, I have not had to withdraw in anger or silence from others. I have been able to stay open to them knowing God has my heart firmly and safely in his hands.

It can be a very daunting thing to give our hearts to Jesus but he wants us to walk in freedom not hidden away behind our own shells of protection, nursing our wounds but to walk openly being able to show love and grace even in the face of unkindness knowing that God will protect and look after us.

Trust in the Lord

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3: 5 - 6

Fifteen years ago my dad wanted to celebrate his 80^th birthday by taking the whole family to South Africa. We were all so excited to be going to stay in a very nice hotel near Cape Town in the middle of the South African summer and to have Christmas in the sun.

About two weeks before we left, God said to me, ‘Give me the holiday’ which I was holding onto very tightly. He wanted me to place it in his open hands. I immediately said a loud and emphatic, ‘No!’ God asked me, ‘Why not?’ I replied immediately, ‘because I don’t trust you. You will take it away from me.’

I was so shocked but I know God was not. I thought I was a woman of faith but obviously I was not. God knew what I felt but it needed to be revealed to my stubborn, unbelieving heart. For the next two days a battle ensued with God just waiting quietly and lovingly and me trying hard to place this wonderful holiday in his hands. Could I trust God to do what was best because underlying all this was the thought that if you gave something good to God he would take it away?

Today I still find it shocking that I thought such an awful thing about my God who only wants and gives good things to his children.  However he knows best and we have to trust him. Abraham had a far harder test of faith. God asked him to sacrifice his one and only child on which so many promises hung. He trusted God that even if he had to kill his son, God would raise him from the dead (Hebrews 11: 19) so that the promise would be fulfilled. Of course as Abraham raised the knife to kill Isaac, a ram was provided but he was prepared to do as God had asked. Amazing faith!

So what happened to the holiday? Two days later, after a lot of giving and taking on my part, I finally managed to give our wonderful holiday into God’s hands and say, ‘I trust you.’ Of course we had the most fabulous holiday but I didn’t know that. I had to trust God. That was the start of many tests of faith but God has been so wonderful. Even when doors have closed that I so wanted to open, it has always been for the best. God’s love never fails.

What I have I give you

Silver and gold I do not have, but what I have I give you Acts 3:6

There are some encouraging stories in the Bible about people who did not have much, but gave what little they had  and God used it for his glory.

The little boy with the five small loaves and two small fish which fed 5000 men, besides women and children (John 6: 8), is the obvious example. There is a parallel story in II Kings 4. Here Elisha was given twenty loaves of bread and used it to feed 100 people.  It may not have been as spectacular a provision as the feeding of the 5000 but it was still a miracle.  It was not enough bread to feed the people but Elisha spoke the word of the Lord that they would eat and have some left over and that is what happened. Whether it was 20 loaves and 100 people or 5 loaves and two fish to feed 5000 men, it still required faith.

Elisha also ministered to the widow who was in debt and whose sons were about to be taken away to be sold to pay the debt. Elisha asked her what she had and again all she had was a little oil. God used her little oil and it became enough to pay her debts and live off (II Kings 4: 1 – 7). 

Peter and John were just on their way to the temple to pray and met the beggar at the Gate Beautiful. They didn’t have any money but they gave what they did have; their faith in the healing power of God. 

All of these stories are about miracles that happen because people are prepared to believe God and act in faith.  All of them knew they did not have enough for the situation but they gave what little they had and let God do the miracle.

I am challenged because I believe God wants to do far greater miracles amongst us than we are currently seeing. The problem is not an unwillingness on God’s part but an unwillingness on ours. Doubt, unbelief, fear of failure or of looking foolish stops us.  God is waiting for us to say’ ‘God use me. I don’t have much but what I do have I give you.’ 

The boy with his five loaves and two small fish didn’t let feeling foolish stop him. Elisha didn’t look at the loaves and think that someone would have to go hungry nor did he look at the widow’s lack and arrange a collection on her behalf.  Peter and John didn’t ignore the beggar because they had no money. All of them stopped looking at what they didn’t have and looked instead to him who has everything we could ever ask for or imagine. Let’s follow their example and ask God to renew our faith and use us to do some of the miracles that I believe God is just waiting to do through some available trusting believer.

Do not worry

 When Jesus was teaching what we now call the Sermon on the Mount, he encouraged the crowd not to worry (Matthew 6:25 - 34).  Jesus was dealing very specifically in this situation with material needs but he also told them  not to worry about tomorrow which covers a lot of situations.  As humans our default setting has a tendency to be ‘worry’.  We worry when we do not know what to do in a specific situation.  Worrying feels like we are doing something. If we worry we may get a solution.   If we don’t worry it feels like we do not care, that something is not important if we don’t worry.  We feel guilty if we don’t worry. 

It was not only Jesus who told us not to worry, Paul wrote to the Philippians to not be anxious about anything – that’s comprehensive!  

The reason Jesus and Paul told people not to worry is that worry is like a cancer that eats into our souls.  It destroys our peace of mind, emotions, bodies and spirits.  As we worry we become further and further disconnected from God as we wrestle with our problem and try, often in vain, to find a solution. 

The antidote to worry is also very clear in the Bible. ‘Cast all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you’ (I Peter 5:7) and ‘do not be anxious about anything but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.’ Then see what happens, ‘And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Phil 4:6 – 7)

Worrying is the worse thing we can do in any troubling situation.  Peter says to cast it or throw it at God.  Imagine a fisherman casting his line into the water.  He doesn't place it or drop it, he casts or throws it.  It is the same with our anxiety or worry - don't just give it to God or drop it in his lap but cast it on him. Why? -  because he cares for you and he has all the answers and all the provision you need for this day.  Jesus told the crowd their loving heavenly Father knew their needs and would be their provider. 

God has everything we need – healing from sickness, deliverance from addiction, provision of all material things and my experience is that God does not just give us what we need but also some of the things we want too.  Do we need work or have a problem at work, a house, freedom from debt – our heavenly Father will provide all we need as we trust him. 

As we trust God, Paul encourages us that the peace of God will come and guard our hearts and minds.  God's peace will help us to stop worrying.  So today, stop worrying and tell God all about it, cast your cares on him and trust him to come up with the answer you need.