Inheritance versus heritage

People will spend a lot of time and effort making sure they leave an inheritance for their children and family. They will work hard to leave their house, money, jewellery and possessions to those who will remain when they die.

However what is even more important is to not just leave an inheritance for our children but to leave a heritage. Heritage is something that is handed down to our ancestors and often it is non material. Family stories, practices, ways of doing things and faith. As Christians passing on our Christian faith is the best possible heritage we can leave our children and family.

One of the greatest blessings for a parent is to see their children and grandchildren living out a personal relationship with Jesus Christ for themselves not based on parental wishes or peer pressure but out of personal conviction. This is the heritage we would most like to pass on.

However the Christian faith is a choice and whilst we can do all we possibly can to pass it on; prayer, church, Bible teaching, lifestyle and so on, at the end of the day it is a personal decision for every individual. One of the greatest heartaches for parents is to see their children turn their back on the faith they were raised in.

Sometimes this may be for obvious reasons; family divorce or breakdown, parents whose faith is far removed from their lives, problems with other Christians or the shortcomings of the church. At other times it may just be the lure of the world and the pleasures that the world appears to hold.

I believe that what we do for the child not walking with God is the same as the one walking with the Lord; pray, bless and maintain good relationships. One of the saddest things is parents who fall out with their children because they have turned their backs on their faith.

God spoke powerfully to me from the title of a Joseph Garlington book Right or Reconciled. So often being right becomes the most important thing. However I believe maintaining relationship through reconciliation is far more important. We will never reach out to the lost whether in or out of our family by maintaining the moral and spiritual high ground that I am right and you are wrong.

If we have brought our children up in the faith, our grown up children know what is right and wrong. They do not need parents going on about their life style choices. They need parents who love and accept them whom they can talk to.

I am not referring to teenagers who still need a firm but loving hand and help with their choices till they have developed a mature judgement. Teenagers who yell at their parents ‘you don’t trust me’ are quite right. We should not trust our youngsters to make mature decisions at this point in their lives. It takes time and maturity to develop good judgement.

However even as adults our children may do things we do not consider appropriate such as living with partners or having sex outside marriage. Our children know this. What they need is our acceptance based on the fact that they and we both know what we think their choice.

In time these children of ours will return to their faith if we are diligent in prayer and loving in attitude. Even if we never see it ourselves, I firmly believe that we can all not only leave an inheritance of material possessions but also a heritage of Christian faith for our family members.